2-23-12
For your consideration:
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"So you really think you're like the girls in chick flicks?" he asked. "Do you have a terminal illness? Are you a shoppaholic? Do you own a lap dog? Are you blonde?"
That was just a little unfair to blondes, but, still, she could envision his point--and she could see how ridiculous it sounded, when framed like that. "Hmm."
"I just don't see the comparison. Maybe don't watch chick flicks."
Not watching chick flicks wouldn't solve the problem. Wouldn't make the world with its unfair expectations and prejudices just disappear, an idea that was hard to articulate, slippery to pin down. "It's not just chick flicks, you know."
"But you're not like the girls in chick flicks," he persisted. He got that serious look in his eyes, the one he usually tried to hide because everyone expected him to be the jokester, the chill dude, the unflappable guy no matter what.
"No, I'm not," she agreed. "No one is." Or, at least, she wasn't. Wasn't spontaneous or crazy, wasn't immediately everyone's best friend, wasn't the one to jump into a pool without checking the depth first. Falling head over heels did not come naturally to her, probably would never come naturally to her.
Still, she wanted to know what a true all-nighter was like, except that she knew she couldn't function productively that late and knew sleep was better. She wanted to know what it was like to be spontaneous, except that she liked being punctual and planned. She wanted to do things and go places and be more, except that she was afraid that she wouldn't be competent, that she would get lost, that she wouldn't measure up.
"You don't have to be. Just be you and everything will work out."
Just be herself? Society had never seemed to accept those who thought before speaking into their midst, especially if those thinkers were women. If she'd lived back in some other era and was the self she was now, she would probably have had a worse time of it, so she smiled--what type of smile, she wasn't sure--and said, "Maybe you're right."
However, unless future experience proved him right, she'd still have her doubts as to the statement's veracity.
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First reaction: I know this. I've heard it. I get where you're coming from.
ReplyDeleteSecond: He's a decent guy, you know. :-)
Third: Being someone else is wasting everyone's time, isn't it? No one else is you (both YOU and "you"), so we won't be able to gain your unique perspective unless you give it to us, and we need it. (Bits of mirror, and all that.)
Besides, I've never liked chick flicks. Few men do. It's odd that the role models for women are . . . women who don't attract men. Hm.
ReplyDelete@Janelle: 1) I know you've heard it. Everything he said before the line "But you're not like the girls in chick flicks" is an actual quote, but, really, that was the whole point of the spiel, was it not? I'm sure if the real life text conversation had continued, I may have seen something like it. It was definitely the point of the rhetorical questions.
ReplyDelete2) And he is a decent guy, both the fiction and the fiction-y one. The real one is as well, which I'm sure is what you were actually talking about. He's much more straight-forward when it comes to such things. Probably differences in our personalities.
3) You've nailed it. Being someone else is wasting everyone's time. I've always thought that, but still, that didn't stop me from unconsciously wanting to be accepted by everybody else. Class Wednesday night really made some things make sense: I'm a N, and we're more rare, and I'm a female T, which is only like 25% of women. Granted, not everything in one's personality can be graphed out with some test, but it did clarify some things for me.
@Robby: That is indeed odd. But, unfortunately, I can't think of anyone (at the moment) is the opposite and would make a good role model. Which sucks, 'cause the last thing I want to do is imitate a chick flick character--I don't want to dumb myself down for anyone, including guys.
It's stupid, really, that chick flicks and their literary equivalent (IMO), romance novels, seem to set the romantic example for women. Life's not like that.
[It's hard to convey sarcasm through the Internets, but I'll try.] Then again, maybe it's one of those things that I'll understand when I'm finally in a relationship. (I don't really believe this sentence. It's just that I've actually had people tell similar things, which is very annoying.)
Wow. That's almost tl;dr. I think that's the longest comment I've written on my own blog.
ReplyDeletethis is awesome! i love it!
ReplyDeletehaha"wasn't the one to jump into a pool without checking the depth first"
I'm glad you like it, Kim.
DeleteI use WOW this is SO GOOD tags.
ReplyDeleteIt deleted my < sarcasm > and < / sarcasm > tags.
DeleteSee, that makes sense. I've used that in other places, or something akin to it, anyway.
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